Today…I saw a dead guy

There are a few times in my life where I think I saw a dead guy. There are times when I have definitely seen a dead person, but this post will only refer to times when you are pretty sure, but not positive that you are looking at a dead guy.

Before today, the most recent time was at Mu Mu’s on NW 21st in Portland. Maybe 2.5 years ago? A big shout out to my homey that was with me, you know who you are. The story goes, I’m in the restroom standing at the urinal, and I notice a hand sticking out from under the stall, a foot behind my feet. I yell, “Hey buddy, you alright?” No response, no movement. I yell again. Nothing. I rally out to my buddy and say, “Dude, you gotta check this out”. One look, and he agrees we gotta tell someone. So we tell the bartender that was pouring us stiffies all night, he grabs his manager, and we all enter the “crime scene”(?). Bartender kicks the stall door open, sure enough, dead guy is propped up against the toilet, no reaction. Was he dead? I expected to see a needle sticking out of his arm, but we didn’t hand around long enough to find out, and got the hell outta there. When referring to the events of that rainy night in NW Portland, drinking Jack on the rocks until 2am on a school (work) night, we say we saw a dead guy.

So today, after work I decide to rally up to Home Plus at the Mullae subway stop on the #2. I plan on spending my Saturday and Sunday seeing some sights, maybe catching a baseball game, so I wanna make a run up to Home Plus now, to stock up on some essentials that you cannot find at my local markets. Things like Campbell’s Chicken Noodle soup, awesome little boxed salads, some fruit and veggies, ground beef and various flavors of Pringles. I only eat Pringles when I’m traveling, and now I’m on permanent travel status… and we all know once you pop, you can’t stop. Plus there is a mammoth food court, and I wanted a break from cooking.

I ride the #7 for two stops before transferring to the #2. As we slow down for stop 1, someone starts talking on the speaker system, and passenger jumps up and runs to the end of my particular car, pretty close to where I am standing. Each subway car has 4-5 doors, I’m 1 door away from a dude in a suit lying flat on his back, neck jacked up all funky on the side of the bench at the floor. Don’t know how I missed this before. I can’t see his face because people are starting to crowd around. Now there 2 people trying to wake him, but like the dead guy I saw at Mu Mu’s, there is zero reaction and no movement to be seen. The subway stops, nobody gets on or off, and there is a fair amount of people crowding around. I can see a little, but didn’t really wanna get right up in it. 3 dudes run down the steps in the subway station, board the train, and all 5 dudes pick dead guy up and carry him off the train. I’m not even kidding, his freaking hair piece fell off his head revealing a completely shiny head, it was more than a little creepy. As they place him on the benches that line the station walls, the doors close and the train pulls away.

Was he dead? Wasted? I’ll never know. If I was in Portland, and saw a dead guy on the MAX or the Streetcar, I’d be reading about it on by now. But here, I don’t think I’ll ever know for sure… which is why I’m just gonna say that today… I saw a dead guy.


I can confirm that I indeed, saw a dead guy. To follow are excerpts from an email from home, a good friend and ER doctor, who no doubt has seen a lot of dead guys:

“Mighta been a dead guy I’m thinkin’. But what I don’t understand is if he was so close to you, how come you didn’t see a dude in a suit laying on the floor or see him go down? Maybe he fainted then broke his neck. Sometimes people who have just fainted can look pretty dead too. We’ll call it a dead guy though. Anyone challenges you, tell ‘em a doctor signed off on it. ”

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~ by ripcitytoseoul on June 5, 2009.

3 Responses to “Today…I saw a dead guy”

  1. Yikes. I’ve only seen a dead guy once. I drove by the scene of a car accident late at night back in 2004. Freaked me out. Not gonna lie. I couldn’t tell if the guy I saw had a hair piece.

  2. I believe ya D. Ya seeee!

  3. D sees dead people!

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